Yellow Umbrella


Today, I came across iflix, which is the closest Asians could get to Netflix (but no, I ain’t chilling with you) and discovered my love once again for Ted Mosby. Ten years after it has premiered, Ted continues to captivate my heart and makes me believe that a character was created just for me, I am Ted, Ted and I should have ended up together. 

What got me was what he told Robyn in the pilot episode:
“You know what? I’m done being single, I’m not good at it. Look, obviously you can’t tell a woman you just met that you love her, but it sucks that you can’t. I’ll tell you something though, if a woman, not you, just some hypothetical woman, were to bear with me through all this, I think I’d make a damn good husband, because that’s the stuff I’d be good at. Stuff like making her laugh and being a good father and walking her five hypothetical dogs.”
And it hit me because today, I just realized to embrace who I am, quirks and all. As the eternal Little Miss Sunshine / Stargirl, I couldn’t help but let every single person in. And that includes people who constantly abuse my kindness. 
You know those people who sweet talk you to feel good about themselves, people who promise a lot of things (and not even grand things, just small ones), and those who always leave you hanging for no reason. Friends say I shouldn’t expect so much and I often don’t but the least I expect from a person is decency. 
People who keep their word or at the very least, show you that you’re valuable, even as a friend. 
And yes, I can’t be a chill girl who plays the game but I can be a good and loyal friend. However, a person has their limits and to be repeatedly treated indifferently or as a way to stroke one’s ego is tiring. 
So today, Little Miss Sunshine cut her ties  and while I do feel guilty, it does feel empowering, not to mention freeing. 
It’s not much to ask to be treated with respect and no, you don’t have to be a “bae” to act on your word and do what you say you would do. 
And while being Ted in a world of Barmeys maybe tough, I’m proud of who I am because one day, the yellow umbrella will arrive but until then, I’m good dancing on my own.