On Competition, Oneness, and Flow


person holding bouquet of flower

We are a few days away from welcoming August in a year that we could easily categorize as unexpected. 

Personally, July was a full month that was dedicated to moving to a new place (my husband and I unpacked everything within a week, yay!), celebrating birthdays and anniversaries, and just getting deeper into my healing practice. Unlike everything else in my life, I never really shared in detail anything in relation to my healing journey not because I am embarrassed by it but because I feel like the right time hasn’t arrived yet. I am still in the process of understanding where I was, where I am, and what’s next, and when I get all that figured out and feel that it’s time, I cannot wait to share it in detail.

I can, however, share parts of it today. For some reason, I just got out of the shower and was powered up to share some thoughts in a way that I haven’t in awhile. Truth be told, I shied away from writing my own feelings and thoughts into my blog for many reasons: one of them being, well 2020 hasn’t been the easiest year ever, and as I dove deeper into my healing journey, I saw a lot of untangling from professional and personal relationships and for a girl who loves to please others, these transitions left me in a state of shock. However, I would also be the first to tell you that letting go of these relationships, owning up to the part I played in it, and simply allowing myself to deal with trauma that has been sitting for decades has allowed me to feel free. 

Now being free doesn’t mean I live in a land of roses (now wouldn’t that be nice) but rather in a feeling of flow – where I am unafraid to feel things and unafraid to sit with them. It also means I am no longer afraid of my shadow – a story that I can’t wait to share when I’m ready and when it’s time.

Today, however, I am simply called to share this thought:

There is no such thing as “better than” life. Our lives are exactly what they are supposed to be in this moment and we must learn to celebrate that. When we learn to stop reaching for a life that is “better” than another, we are free to embrace what we are given today.

To me, that is incredibly important. The victim mindset (one that I, unfortunately, have been trapped in for a while) thinks that we need to be better than those who have hurt us but in reality, there is no scorecard, there is no game to be won. We are all just learning from each other and just being directed to the highest good. Every person we meet is a teacher and a mirror of what we need to heal. We can all wish each other well – even those who have hurt us and those we have hurt. When we come from a place of oneness instead of competition, we enter into a beautiful flow of life where we learn to forgive not just others but ourselves as well. It’s such a beautiful place to be and it all starts with a simple shift, of understanding that there is no “us” vs “them” but rather a connectedness, one that allows us to learn from one another rather than attack one another constantly.

Now, this doesn’t mean that we hold on to toxic relationships (that’s a common misconception) but rather let them go in love, wish them well, and see them as light. Yes, we can end relationships in a positive way and wish them well even if we never speak to them again. It’s okay to walk away from relationships but we must do so with gratitude knowing that what we learned from them was important to our own journey.

Wishing you love and light today, may this message resonate at the right time.