so what is really going on with me?


I know most of my past entries were really shallow. Nothing like my first blog. I don’t put in as much as I used to. I still write a lot though, just that I keep these thoughts to myself ( well actually my real journal keeps that.) And maybe its cause i’m super busy too. Too busy to just sit down and dwell on things.
But that doesn’t mean I don’t think things over anymore. I do, I just have different priorities right now. I mean how could I dwell on something so petty when i have six subjects to study for?! All of the information couldn’t fit in my brain anymore and I don’t want to stress myself more than I already am.
A lot has happened in my first term and i do mean a lot. I still get my moody hits. It comes every now and then, but its subtler this time. Instead of me freaking out everytime my moodiness comes, I just keep still and eventually i let it go.
I’ve grown up a lot. Its a good thing but growing up could be so boring. There’s a kid in me thats screaming to get out. I miss my kiddie self but at the same time so proud that I am where I am now.
I’m not a hypocrite, I must admit that I miss feeling “in love” (im not sure thou if i’ve ever been in love but the idea of it maybe). I miss having something to look forward to. But then again, reality is knocking on my door already. Its time for me to let go. I still visit it from time to time though, its just that right now i don’t have the time.
Growing up can be so…tiring. But the fruits of it is fun. Ahhh? What am I saying?
I have joy now. Meaning that it isn’t as fickle as my happiness. It’s always there. No matter how moody I get, its just there.
And that kind of balances everything out.
Kind of.