Yesterday, I finally had the nerve, not to mention the funds to have my otherwise pesky hair rebonded.

Yes, rebonding is something that I’ve wanted to do since I graduated from high school a little over three years ago. I only got to fulfill that dream of wash and wear hair yesterday.

I’m already done with school and now working. So I guess a couple of things take awhile.

But somehow, instead of feeling excited, I fell asleep a bit sad.

That’s because I’ve had my hair relaxed in high school and the results weren’t as stellar as I expected them to be.

I don’t know what it is about high school that makes you want to relive them every once in awhile. Maybe it’s the bittersweet sensation that goes along with it. Remembering high school also makes you see how much you have changed since those awkward years.

It just reminded me of Josie Grossie’s character from one of my most favorite films ever, Never Been Kissed.

I don’t think I’d ever go back to high school again but there are just some situations wherein I feel like I’m in high school again. Insecurity, I guess is prevalent for everyone at any age.

Those were the thoughts that I was thinking of last night. My Josie Grossie stories in high school and my very own version of Billy Prince.

I don’t know why really. I’m a very big fan of moving forward and not letting the past dictate what’s happening to our lives now but somehow the moments are very similar in one way or another.

And in a way, that creates a sense of fear. Remember how Josie felt when she was about to experience her second prom? She was afraid because what if history would repeat itself once again? What if her current Billy Prince would hurt her once again?

Is it fair to judge your current Billy Prince based on what the Billy Prince from the past did?

I know the answer to these questions and it once again gave me enlightenment.

Drew Barrymore’s character couldn’t have said it better, “I’m not JOSIE GROSSIE anymore!”
I would no longer allow the bad events that happened in the past to engulf me anymore. I shouldn’t let fear dictate the decisions that I would make in the next couple of days.

I know things will change very soon. I could only look forward to them and this time rest assured, I’m no longer looking back.