Serendipity

Serendipity is defined as, “the occurrence and development of events by chance in a happy or beneficial way”. While some may quickly associate it with romantic notions, I have long been a firm believer that serendipity goes beyond meeting “the one” in the middle of a busy store in New York City. I’ve always believed that God prepares us for what to come by aligning the right people at exactly the right time.
My friendship with supermom, Cathy Nazareno began rather serendipitously. We first met when I conducted an interview with the Younghusbands for this very same paper four years ago. Since we both lived in the South of Metro Manila, bumping into each other at the grocery store or at the mall was inevitable. It is also safe to say that Facebook contributed greatly to our friendship.
The first thing I can tell you about Cathy is that she is strikingly beautiful from the get go, but what makes the mother of three remarkable is her strong sense of self, and most importantly, her determination to win in life, whether at work or in personal matters. I’ve always believed that we become like the five people we hang out with the most so at my age, I’ve always sought for the wisdom of those older and wiser than me and I’m fortunate that Cathy has allowed me to take a peek into her jam-packed life.
Aside from being a mother of three to her three equally successful daughters Cathy is also the CEO of the Chelsea FC Soccer school in partnership with James and Phil Younghusband, the President of Mac2 Group, a company that represents athletes and handles sports events, owner and president of Casa Belrina Travel Consultants, a partner at Surface Guru and just recently became a partner of the Alcasid Total Entertainment and Artist Management. The St. Mary’s College of California graduate also has experience as a Match Commissioner for FIFA AFC and AFF (both men and women) all throughout Asia all while raising her three daughters.
Her resume is enough to leave someone impressed, but what makes her different is her strong sense of passion to serve others, “I think my purpose in life is to serve the athletes that my group and I are currently handling. We wanted to give opportunities and help these athletes who don’t know much about the business side of sports.” Cathy, just like me, also believes in God ordained meetings that help her connect people with one another, this she believes, is one of her greatest strengths.
When asked how she manages her very tight schedule while being a single mom, she was quick to say, “Life is tough in terms of juggling between meetings, travel, my kids’ activities, and just plainly lounging around. But I am blessed with wonderful girls who understand their mom’s motivation is to work beyond self but rather be a servant for others.”
It is not a secret that Cathy’s “put others first” attitude that easily translates to action and her passion for life in general has greatly influenced the success of her three daughters. Her eldest daughter, Franky Rivilla, 22 graduated as a football scholar from the University of Sto. Tomas with a degree in Industrial Desgin and is currently a Visual Display Officer for one of the major department stores in the country. Her second daughter, Kitkat plays football with the Chelsea Ladies Team and is currently a second year Multi-Media arts student. Her youngest, Reese was recently taken as an aspirant for the ballet company she dances with.
Cathy’s positive nature is a reminder than life can indeed be beautiful if one chooses to see the good in every situation and use every opportunity for the better. Her life is not an example of a perfect, trouble free existence, but one that has stood well from the roadblocks life has thrown her way.

Just Give Me The Donut!

Millenials are busy creatures. Aside from clocking in at an uber cool 9-5 job, going to school, and basically surviving Metro Manila traffic on rainy days, there’s also a lot of extracurricular activities: trying out new fitness routines, meeting up with friends, and oddly enough, fighting off our love for food in the hopes of looking good in our next Instagram photo.
I’ve always had a love-hate relationship with food. Growing up as chubby kid, I’ve always strived to be a petite, five foot three (or four) mestizo like my mom and older sister by trying to shy away from all the things I love in life including my top three favorites: pizza, pasta, and cake. However, despite all the calorie counting, countless gym mavericks (seriously my trainer thinks letting me do the butt walk will help ward off the bulge), and basically arguing with food, my dreams of being a petite mestiza will not be simply because a) I’m five foot eight and b) more weight is needed when you tower over everyone else.
It has also come to my realization that everyone’s in on the food counting obsession too. It’s like part of a typical millenials’ daily routine is the constant push and pull of wanting to eat in one of the many glorious food establishments mushrooming in Metro Manila and the need to look like the next magazine cover. The problem has persisted for ages but it’s in an extremely heightened state today due to social media. Suddenly, hiding the fresh fifteen after a break up or a disappointment is no longer possible because with one snap your true self is revealed.
It’s heartbreaking to see so many intellectual, smart, and fashion forward girls fall into this trap. I know that men also have their insecurities about the handles (I would personally like to say sorry for oogling over the now in shape Chris Pratt, but believe us women when we say he was actually hot before dropping the lbs) but not in the way women torture themselves over a donut. There’s a lot of oogling, ahhing, and crying involved and it’s not pretty. While getting ready for work this morning, I suddenly wondered why so much time, effort, and tears are invested in chasing after an impossible weight goal when the same amount of time can be invested in changing the world or being kind to one another?
And while I’m all for encouraging women to look their best in anyway they see fit, I’m also for women taking a stock on how their character is developing through all of this. Have we become in gripes with other women simply because they have a different body type? Do we undergo rigorous and impossible routines just so we can “beat” another woman? While the intention of being the best looking versions of ourselves is a noble cause, doing it to prove to others that you can too isn’t.
In fact, I’ve personally experienced it myself that no matter how many pounds I lose or how “good” I look, it wouldn’t matter if I’m not at peace on the inside or if I’m constantly looking over my shoulder out of the fear that I’m no longer the “best”.

It’s a simple adage, we all deserve happiness and we all deserve to be beautiful and eating that donut won’t, in any sense, take that away.

Redefining Success and Your Life’s Masterpiece

“Remember this, nothing happens to you but everything happens for you. When something takes place in your life that seems to work against you, think again. Maybe God is just working behind the scenes and planning something grand for you.” – Marianne Mencias, What’s Your Life’s Masterpiece
I’ve been thinking a lot about success lately. For the longest time, I found myself defining success the same way the world has — “titles, degrees, investment, money, public speaking skills and being number one.”
But events that have transpired lately have made me question my beliefs about it. Is a good man’s success only limited by his title? Is success just measured by the amount of money I make? Am I not successful because I chose a different path?
Contemplating about success has led me to some astonishing conclusions.
For one thing, success is not just about the title of a man, but in how he treats those under him. A leader is not about being an aggressor. Being a leader is knowing that your past life experiences, your knowledge about your field, and your passion can serve as an encouragement to those who wish to achieve the same things you have. Most people have associated success with getting without realizing that it’s a good position to be giving.
Success is also about finding your purpose. As I’ve written in my Father’s Day article, my dad has amazing achievements to boot and have received notable “titles” in his lifetime, but what makes him a success is not found in those titles or achievements. His success is found in the lives of the people he has encouraged both on and off the court, beyond the spotlight, and sometimes, even without a thank you. But my dad’s character has proven that when you have a purpose in life and you pursue it, you win.
Helping people find their purpose is the exuberant Marianne Mencias, author of the book, “What’s Your Life’s Masterpiece?” The book, which features, ten world class Filipinos trumps the belief that there is only one cookie cutter way to success. In fact, Marianne discusses and inspires by saying that you were given your own personal puzzle pieces for a reason. Creating your life’s masterpiece begins by understanding your strengths and knowing that even if it differs from another, it doesn’t lessen its positive impact in the world if you use it well.

She is quick to say, “Success is not only for the limited few, it belongs to all of us, waiting to be claimed if we are only true to who we are and what we love.” Her enlightening book reminds one is already successful the moment they pursue their life’s calling by actively going after the things they love and the things they’re good at.
Most of the time, we fear the very things we’re good at simply because the world tells us we’ll never reach success if we pursue them. However, we forget, that the only way we can truly be successful is to be true to ourselves, and in turn, it is this that allows us to go forth in the world and truly make a difference.
What’s Your Life’s Masterpiece will be launched on July 31, 2014 in a unique book launch for cause supporting Gawad Kalinga and Hapinoy. For more information, you may like What’s Your Life’s Masterpiece on Facebook or email cometolifegig@gmail.com.

Per-SONA-fied

Politics is a common topic in our household and not in a “we want to overturn it” kind of way but in an “it’s interesting to talk about” kind of way. This, coupled with an older brother who graduated with a Political Science from Loyal Marymount University fueled my younger brother and I’s interest in what was going on in the world.
I brought my interest in politics with me to college and just like any idealistic coming of age student, I often aired my “the government could do better” to anyone who dared to listen (my blog was often the recipient of my college rants and have now turned into cringe worthy reminders of my once “know it all” attitude) without realizing the enormity of what I was talking about. There was more to it than simply following where the crowd was going when it came to their opinion of the government.
I started changing my mind about the government right about the same time our current president was elected. I was far from being a Pnoy supporter in my younger years but I was looking forward to seeing his “tuwid na daan” coming to life, if it ever did. Was he just the son of or was he going to be something more?
Just like State of the Nation addresses before the last, this year’s SONA started off as a fashion show that I could care less about (it reminded me of prom: so much prepping for an hour of sitting down) that I was quick to disregard as it as another “papogi” effort of the president, but listening to him this time made me see him for who he was: a human being. Past speeches of the president have always made me feel like he was always on the defense: combative, devoid of emotion, and ready to give a sermon at the drop of the hat. I never saw him as a human being bothered by critics and so on; to me he was the president, nothing more, nothing less.
And while I am not in the position to discuss what he should or shouldn’t have talked about, I came to see him as a man with literally 100 million lives on his shoulders – all of which asking for different things and have different priorities. But while I do have personal issues I wish he prioritized such as solid and better education system for everyone (alongside higher wages for hardworking public teachers), a better transportation system, putting highly abusive sen-actors in jail, and the dream fulfilled of a no corruption society, I understand that he’s doing the best he can with what he has.
With all the gripes on social media (understandable and everyone’s right), it’s easier to throw stones at the government demanding for change without realizing that that power lies within us, it always has.

It’s our responsibility to get up and vote for who we think are the right candidates. It’s also our responsibility to help instead of constantly challenging the government by typing on our keyboard screens in our air conditioned rooms, and it is also in our responsibility to act instead of just saying we will or expecting someone else to do it.
From the way I see it, we are in a better condition than we used to be and yes, there’s a long way to go, but seeing progress right before our eyes (seeing sen-actors paying their dues did it for me) and celebrating it for a moment helps in moving forward together. It’s such a cliché and maybe a bit dewy-eyed idealistic, but greater things happen if we choose to move forward together, instead of constantly pointing fingers. Mahatma Gandhi knew what he was talking about when he said the change we want starts with us, it always has.

The Matti Experience

My rebellion stage peaked when I was eleven and in fifth grade at Colegio San Augstin, Makati. And when I say rebellion, please do take it lightly. The most ‘rebellious’ I got was eating in class, passing notes, and making fun of teachers with my favorite partner in crime, “Syfu”. Teachers told us (are they even allowed to say this) that our future would never amount to anything. My parents moved me out of CSA two years after, however, thanks to technology I have managed to keep in touch with old friends, including Syfu, who now goes by the name Krizzie “Kriz” Syfu.
Not only is my best girl pal a real girl now (haha), but also an up and coming director, and not just a director of any kind, but one trained well under the premiered Erik Matti. I’ve always known Syfu (please allow me to still call you that) as feisty, determined, and relentless. Turns out, it was these qualities what made her rise through the ranks under the mentorship of Erik Matti. She went from becoming a Script Continuity Assistant Director, to Second Unit Director, Post Producer, Associate Producer for critically acclaimed films like the Cannes famed On the Job, Rigodon, and The Aswang Chronicles to an Advertising Director. The most recent she did was the Jollibee ‘Bakit Sarap Maging Pilipino’ ad.
When asked what made her pursue this, she was quick to say, “Looking back, I can tell it has always been what I wanted to do. Even when I was in first grade, I was already the one leading stage plays and performances. It felt very natural for me to lead a group and come up with some form of entertainment. I have also loved watching movies and always had a video camera with me.”
Syfu beat the odds, like she always has, by becoming a director fresh out of college. She says that this was the time that she truly honed not just her skills but her character as well, “There are pros of becoming a director fresh out of college – you get to learn from your own mistakes and get your name out there right away; but I’d like to believe that the best way to do it is still to learn from the best. Some sushi chefs wait 10 years to make their first sushi – there’s a certain charm of going through the ranks and earning your way up. Personally, I believe the most important thing that apprenticeship did to me is this: it killed my ego from the onset, and then there was only room for learning.
She was also quick to note that her naïve perception of film making in the country was quashed instantly, “ I used to think that being a filmmaker in the Philippines was to live like a starving artist – I was very naïve. I don’t even know where I got that idea but mind you, I did start that way. I guess it pays to have an idol; it puts things in perspective and it helps one set a goal – in my case, it was again my mentor, Erik Matti, who excels in both the TV Commercial world and in making movies, who made me think that one can make a career out of directing. He juggled TV Commercials and internationally acclaimed movies together, I guess it made me think that it can be done.”
When asked how she is able to keep her head above water, especially in her dog eat dog industry, she was quick to note, “It’s being with my family of Revolver Studios and Shoestring Productions. Since I’m the only female director and one of the youngest in the roster, I would sometimes feel unsure of what I do, but I always just need to ask the veteran directors in the roster and they generously give me advice aside from my mentor. It helps me stay in the business despite the long hours and crazy schedules, specifically because even if the industry is in itself cutthroat, it’s really good to be in the comfort of family.”
Kriz was also excited to share what she loved most about her job, “My passion is filmmaking. I love seeing visual stories unfold. I love being able to see how simple elements come together to form an image in a frame. I love entertaining, and getting people to react – be it laughter, tears – or even just to remember. I love working with people who are equally passionate about showing and not just telling stories – those who can’t sleep the night before a shoot. I love feelings – feelings after watching something for the first time or even in watching something over and over. My passion is making movies or even just short sequences that could feel like it’s a story worth showing. My passion is also watching them. I guess I’ll forever be part of that big audience.”

It’s always a great feeling to see old friends succeed, but more than that, it’s refreshing to see people from our generation stand up, create, and contribute. People like Kriz who live out of their passion truly make all the difference in the world.

Into the Mad House

About two weeks ago, the company I work for turned two (happy anniversary, perky peeps!) and during our celebration my officemate Roz piped, “We’re not even talking to each other, we’re just on our phones!” And oddly enough, this is the culture that has developed. It is no longer weird for two people right next to each other to like and comment on another’s photo on Instagram while sitting next to each other. This culture has been extremely prevalent that even ad campaigns are calling for us to put down our phones and communicate with each other.
And while people may be quick to state the negative effects of technology, the positive effects of it definitely outweigh the bad. This is especially true for straight out of college kids who have already gained multi-hyphenated titles. Unlike the career path of the generations before us, there are no black and white rules, and everyone has a better chance at learning and adapting and progressing.
The unique culture has also quashed any “desk” jobs that used to be the norm. Today, the younger generation is making a killing at setting trends and gaining followers. It’s a generation unlike any other and as someone in her mid twenties (according to my boss, I still have a year to say that), I needed insight to better understand this from someone younger.

That someone was Nikko Panti, the producer of the popular online fashion magazine that houses the biggest bloggers in the Philippines including David Guison, Lissa Kahayon, Miko Carreon, Mikyle Quizon and Dani Baretto called MadHouseMNL. Nikko was quick to describe the latest sensation, “Most of us are online. Bloggers are the ones who deliver what’s happening in a instant through social media.” These days, bloggers are deemed more credible due to the fact that they are just your ordinary, everyday young twenty something with extraordinary taste in music, fashion, and food. Aside from traditional blogging, MadHouseMNL also has MadTVPH, also created by these fresh graduates. And true to its multi-hyphenated culture, MadHouseMNL also provides creative designs, blog management, and digital/ public relations to other bloggers.
Nikko, who graduated with a degree in Psychology from Letran, says the biggest challenge in producing an online centric company is to “deliver it first to the readers. The competition of the online platform is stuff and so publishing a story first makes all the difference. For Nikko, being involved in this line of work also means living in the now and engaging in his number one passion: sharing stories.
And what’s refreshing about this new culture is that they no longer find the need to wait, such as wait for the right opportunity, the promotion, to make enough money etc to pursue their passion. Technology has given us, possibly through the growing culture of Thought Catalog, BuzzFeed, and Bustle, the courage to pursue our dreams with our eyes closed and no questions asked.

And it’s shaping the world into a different place, yes, but also into ultimately, a better one where each voice is heard and no longer set aside.

If You Say So

Feedback is an essential part the corporate world. Every business book, seminar, college lecture, and assessment tool underlies its importance. Employees (myself included) often shudder at the mere thought of having to face a superior and have your weaknesses laid out on a table. Some bosses are gracious, making sure feedback stays between you and them, while other bosses are ruthless, pointing it out in front of other employees as a form of tough love.
Dealing with feedback, no matter how gracious we are in accepting them, is never an easy task. When we were younger, feedback almost always felt personal. It always felt like an attack, especially from the boss you don’t really get along with. I found myself crying after my first assessment and thinking this is it, I will never be who I’ve always wanted to be (forgive my drama queen moments, I was raised in the era of Lizzie McGuire and Lindsay Lohan).
However, I have come to realize that bad feedback, even the most hurtful; do not have to be the end of the line for anyone. In fact, with the right amount of fair feedback, it becomes this wonderful thing with which we can build our better selves upon. There are so many calm, cool, focused, and collected people out there who can bravely look feedback in the eye and use it to their advantage, even if they’re bleeding while doing so. 
Some of us who have exceled in the academe all our lives find it difficult to accept our weaknesses and faults, simply because we’ve based our worth on points and systems. But life, in as much as I detest admitting it, is never just black and white. Just like Christian, there are many greys in between (high five if you get the reference). Work life can be quite exciting, especially if you get one “great job” after another, however, in those moments where all you get are red marks and “try again”, where do you find the fuel to move forward?

It’s quite easy: focus on the work, find ways to improve how to do your job, and realize that the end goal is to do what you are paid to do, no more, no less. As an emotional and extremely passionate human being, this has been quite difficult for a time. However, when you love something, you find ways to make it work. You sacrifice, find ways to improve yourself, and become better simply because you’re inspired to do so.
The other flipside of feedback is also this: it’s merely an opinion of someone else, not a fact. Learn to sift through what you heard and look at it objectively: What’s the truth, what do I know myself to be, and can I use this to improve myself? If feedback was merely used to belittle your beliefs and your values with no endpoint of improving anything in your life, toss it.

Truth is, everyone has an opinion from the way you dress to what you believe in. We just have to be kinder to ourselves and sharper in listening to what is good for us and what isn’t. Once you learn to find that balance, feedback will no longer be a word you fear, but instead a tool you use to ultimately mold you to the person you dream of being. 

Breaking The Athletic Stereotype with Greg Slaughter

In the days of deadlines, boardroom meetings, and events, I sometimes forget that there are many people my age who have chosen a less conventional path, one that has nothing to do with reports, ROIs, and even positions.
A good example is the Philippine Basketball Association’s most popular rookie of 2013-2014, Gregory “Greg” Slaughter. I first knew of Greg through my good friend slash die-hard Ginebra fan, Von. For friendship’s sake, I asked Greg for a fan video for Von during one of my dad’s function and was surprised at how soft spoken and well-versed Greg is.
Greg is currently one of the league’s most dominant centers, raking up extremely big numbers across all the boards for the Barangay Ginebra Kings. Greg, who has an Ateneo De Manila University education tucked under his belt, chose to forego the typical yuppie path of suits and ties in favor of a red and white jersey, and a gym, instead of a corner office.
When asked why, he was quick to say, “I love playing basketball. I wouldn’t want any other job. It’s fun being able to compete with others, and see the progress you make.”
And while others might see his typical two to three hour “working” days as “the life”, Greg is quick to downplay it, “The biggest misconception is that we live easy lives, we work just as hard as anyone.” For Greg “a day in the office” means spending hours in the gym after practice, making sure to improve his craft.
And just like any yuppie just starting out, he himself has experienced disappointments, “It can be tough when things aren’t going your way, but the good thing about the sport is it’s my own stress reliever. So if things aren’t working out the I want them to, practicing is actually the way for me to feel better.”
Despite the similarities, it is quite true that basketball players in the Philippines live quite a privileged life, from the fame, money, and to the many adoring fans. From a struggling yuppie’s perspective, it can be quite wonderful, but for Greg, the perks have never been the focal point of his life, “Basketball players play basketball. If one can’t pride themselves on that and keep that as their number one priority then they probably won’t do very well in it.”  He also credits his humble, and down-to-earth nature to how his parents raised him, he says it’s this that helps him to not be overwhelmed with the fame and everything else attached to it.
Those who spend the entire days in the office may think that Greg, along with other athletes, live the perfect life. It has always been in our human nature to think that, especially on challenging days.
However, sitting down with Greg along with stories from my dad and younger brother opened my eyes to the real world of basketball.
It’s not all rainbows and butterflies, and the insurmountable pressure felt by one can be extremely overwhelming and can only be overcome by genuine love and passion for what you do.
And as a footnote, I’d like to share the biggest stereotype Greg smashed into pieces for me: the “athletes without depth” stereotype. Not only is Greg eloquent but was also an honor roll student in high school and took advanced placement classes.
Truly, when you make the effort, you’ll see that people are never the way you assume them to be.

My Dad, The Great

One of my favorite success stories to shares is that of my dad’s.
Born and raised in Cebu, my dad was born with an innate determination to have a life better than the environment he was born in. From the moment he was a little boy, he worked odd jobs while perfecting the craft he was passionate about – basketball. His efforts soon paid off when he joined the RP Youth Basketball Team in 1978-79 and was soon recruited to join the Gold Eagle Team (under San Miguel Corporation) in the Philippine Basketball Association in 1980.
But more than the awards placed around our homes, the recognition from basketball fans that comes when I mention his name, and the comfortable life he has given our family, what makes my dad truly great is his character – greatly etched by all the things he went through – both good and bad. My dad strived to be the kind of father who was always there – foregoing personal pleasures in order to be there to tuck us in at night, and to be the first face we see when we wake up. To say that my dad was a “hands on dad” is quite an understatement, he was more than just there for us, he was and continues to be involved in our lives.
My dad taught me about an ambition – of never settling just because it was the easier route. When it came to work, my dad has always been my inspiration. From the moment he entered the crazy world of basketball, my father has been putting in his entire heart and soul to a game he has loved, and it has reaped its benefits. It was his career in basketball that has put food on the table, and gave us an education. My father didn’t care about recognition; he always told me that if you love and invest in what you do, it will love you back. His love of learning has also inspired my own, my dad is always finding ways to improve himself.
He is also my number one adviser when it comes to relationships, and while he couldn’t shield me from life’s inevitable heartaches, his words of wisdom has always become my anchor – his love has become a benchmark in what I should expect from the men I entertain in my life. My dad has scoffed upon my choices as of late, but I know someday, I’ll meet someone who he’d approve of.  
So today, I dedicate this article to my dad, the man who has worked extremely hard to give us the life he only imagined to have when he was little. God has indeed been good, and He will continue to be good in the days to come.
And to end, Happy Father’s day to all the super dads out there – your love is making all the difference in the world.

A Raket for Every Juan

“Uy, refer mo naman ako sa friend/ cousin / brother / tito/ tita/ insert someone closely related here,” is a sentence often heard once you leave the comforts of school and plunge into the world of earning your keep. It is not uncommon for the spirit of bayanihan to come alive when one needs a little lift or push during the job search.
Filipinos have long been known to be matiyaga and matiisin when it comes to earning a living. Since most Filipinos come from humble beginnings, we ultimately don’t mind rising from the ranks, and even foregoing our ultimate childhood dream in favor of a job that gives us stability.
And while these two scenarios may be completely be off hand from each other, they are actually components of the everyday Juan. A large number of Filipinos often get their first jobs via referral, and often stay in that job, even if it’s not something they are passionate about, in order to make ends meet.
These are the two major factors that inspired Raket.PH, the latest tool to help Filipinos to build their identity, follow their dreams, and become who they always wanted to be. Basically, it brings to the internet the “uy, refer mo naman ako” culture, and makes it work for the everyday Filipino worker.
One of the founders, Lyle Jover, along with his partners JP Menjares, Bryan Martinez says, “We had a dream to create an impact in society. Filipinos are very talented, but often lack opportunity; this makes it hard to see our dreams come true. Our vision comes from a desire to help.”
Raket.PH is meant to be a platform for professionals and freelancers to finally make their dreams come true. Lyle believes that each Filipino can still make their dreams come true without having to quit their day jobs by creating a profile listing their talents on Raket.PH and soon they can interact with employers in need of part-time workers. Not only will they be earning more, but also they will be able to enhance their skills and talents without having to sacrifice meeting their family’s needs.
Jover adds, “Our entire team believes that this could really be something, something that people can rely on, and give them opportunities that hopefully go beyond the Philippines. We took this risk because we believe that it is worth taking.”

Truly, with Raket.PH, the possibilities that used to be limited are now limitless.