i think i got my anger control from my dad.

just like my dad, i don’t speak when i’m mad, instead i retreat to my room, write endlessly on my journal and just cry my heart out.

however, ever since I started working, i found the value in fighting for myself and i’ve come to realize that one of my weaknesses is fighting for my family.

even if my family and i don’t get along 24/7 (which family does anyway?), i would still go to great lengths to fight for them against anyone who does them any harm, which is exactly what happened today.

there are days when i pray that I wish I don’t give in to anger, but somehow, you have to. I do regret releasing my anger today but somethings need to be done and need to be said.

sometimes, i wish i could not feel such things or i shouldn’t give in to the temptation and yet, i’m only human and on days like these, I’m reminded of God’s grace working through me.

without Him, i am nothing. nothing.

Praise God!

I saw a movie today that made my heart leap and it was as if the world was whispering to me this message of God’s timing and how He works without our help.

It’s something we truly could not understand until we completely surrender everything at His feet and allow Him to move.

Miss You Like Crazy is by far my favorite Tagalog film knocking off A Very Special Love from the number one spot.

It simply reminded me that love is something so beautifully complex that you can’t really define it.

It’s funny how magazines like Cosmo try to define and make rules as to how to get a guy and keep a guy when in fact at the end of the day, no matter how how many rules you follow, if it’s not for you, it won’t work out.

A friend of mine told me that sometimes we become monsters in specific relationships just because we’re not with the one we’re supposed to be with.

We turn into this monster and it leads to the relationship’s demise. It doesn’t make us or our partner bad or evil, it just has to work out the way that it should and it could mean parting ways.

Yes, I do believe in making choices but there are simply some things that you cannot fight with, some things you can’t control.

So everything that has happened was meant to happen and I think more people would be happier if they learned this simple truth and let it go.

The person you’re supposed to be with will find it’s way, all it takes is timing.

Day Fifteen: Ordinary Day

It’s another one of those Thursdays, but I’ve had enough of those “barely get by” days instead I’ve learned to find comfort and joy in the littl-est things, like this picture of Pipay.

Today, i’ve come to realize the importance of being there for a child and for allowing a child to wander. Pipay loves the computer and she loves techie stuff, which is why I don’t stop her from playing with my computer, it’s these little memories that a child feels loved and trusted.

And i love being able to play a part in her growing up and being there for her.

It’s something beautiful to be a part of and I’m happy about that, that’s why this isn’t just one of those ordinary days.

today, i woke up feeling stressed and depressed because of my weight.

and then i met with an uncle who just had a triple bypass and i felt ashamed as he told me how the Lord delivered Him from a condition that could have caused him his life.

it’s wonderful how the Lord works when you need him the most, but the best part about it is that we never really know how he works.

last night, i was crying my heart out and i really wanted the Lord to move in an area of my life and last night, i had no way out, i didn’t know where to turn and i didn’t know where to look, with eyes shut, i surrendered everything to the Lord.

i knew He was going to work eventhough I didn’t know how and I knew how impossible it was.

He spoke through a 39 year old executive, a family friend, who’s always been faithful to Him and the Lord has rewarded Him, but of course, just like any good thing, the enemy tried to bring God’s faithful servant and still, He emerged victorious and with a story to tell, a story that would remind millions including me and my family.

nothing is impossible with God.

This I keep reminding myself, because despite my emotions, despite the situations, it doesn’t have anything to do with How amazing God is and what He can do.

But before anything else, I have to go back to the Source, to Him. Before the Lord could grant me the beautiful things that He has promised once i’m ready for it, meaning that He has to prepare me so when the good things come, I don’t forget where it all came from, that I don’t forget the source.