Uncategorized

- admin Leave a comment

August 16, 2010: The Microwave-d Egg

I found a new trick and I don’t think I should be proud about this but I am, I am now able to cook fried egg minus the oil and the salt. Just put it in the microwave for four minutes (yes, I’ve figured out the perfect time for it) and viola, instant beef-silog at home. Now I refuse to eat anything salty without my lovable microwave-d egg.

Brilliant.

I know I should be moving into other things soon. Like microwave-d pesto maybe?

- admin Leave a comment

August 15, 2010: The Big Game

It was a great Sunday.

To begin with church was amazing, Pastor Paul’s message was very timely. I knew from the moment I woke up that we were going to win the game that night. I haven’t watched a Finals game in ages and it felt incredible. But what was the most incredible about that night was the fact that the entire SMB family was together in one spirit, seeking for God’s guidance and will.

It felt really good to be able to pray after that exciting game. Of course I didn’t know then that we weren’t going to take home the crown, but that game alone made the series worth it.

- admin Leave a comment

yes i still have that little confession

I will blame this entry on Clarissa Jean D. Torres.


It was about a week ago, prior to my “confessions to my future husband entry” that I wanted to confess (albeit the title) to him all the guys that i’ve shared a piece of my heart with.

But last week, I never quite understood the point of it all since the closest that i’ve ever had to a relationship is one that involves Pepsi Max, the first ever Iron Man film and basketball, a whole lot of basketball.

But still, sharing your heart and dreams with someone, even for a short time is still that — sharing your heart with someone. it’s still an intimate part that your husband would never get to have because you chose to give it to someone else.

I wasn’t supposed to sift through all of that emotional sh** that has caused me great discomfort throughout the two years *ahem* that I’ve been playing games with said person.

And then I came across the trailer of Eat, Pray, Love courtesy of Clarissa Jean D. Torres.

And although i promised myself not to go anywhere near that thirty second trailer until i finish reading the book (i am now in Indonesia, so a few more pages), I went ahead and allowed myself to be enticed by James Franco.

Then I came across one of my favorite quotes from the book so far and this is a paraphrase since i’m so bad at remembering direct quotes, “i’ve always had a guy, i never even had two weeks for myself before giving my heart away again!”

And that’s how I feel right now and you know, i just realized that after my failed almost relationship with someone who never knew what he wanted except for the gym, i’ve totally learned to stand up on my own two feet instead of constantly demanding someone to carry me.

For the first time ever, I am not crushing on anyone or thinking of someone 24/7. And it feels great because I’ve always depended on it to make me feel good about myself and suddenly, I truly enjoy the freedom of it all.

I enjoy not constantly looking at my cellphone, trying to see if he replied. I enjoy being able to go out without even fixing myself because it doesn’t matter, I enjoy working out for me and not for some guy who said I wasn’t thin enough for him. (yes, this guy actually exists)

It’s a fun time to be in and although I’d love to travel to all the countries that Elizabeth traveled to, i’m doing quite fine with my computer and my blog.

To be able to be free from the lapses of a dysfunctional relationship is truly all that a girl could wish for and i wish that for every girl that i know that i love dearly. That hopefully they can reach a point where they find comfort in who they are, instead of who they’re with.

it’s highly empowering.


- admin Leave a comment

Confessions to My Future Husband

“watch your hands move along my face they trace

all the lines i’ve lived

it isn’t hard to love your scars ’cause that’s
everywhere you’ve been”

Dear Future Husband,

It’s taking awhile for you to get here.

And for the first time in my life, i’m not being impatient. I know that in God’s time, everything will fall into place and we’d have nothing to worry about. I know that we haven’t met yet because we still need to work on things on our own before we can finally get together.

I think the Lord wants the both of us to find complete freedom in Him so when the time comes, we won’t need each other.

The road that is leading me to you has a lot of twists, turns and bumps.

Most of the twists and the bumps produced scars that’s taking awhile to heal but I know that these scars would turn me into a better person, as cheesy as it may sound.

I’m no longer broken, future husband and I do hope that when I meet you I wouldn’t be as irrational or as insecure as I used to be. But God’s working on it, He’s working on changing my heart.

I’ve always thought that meeting you would magically fix every single problem in my life and i’m thankful that I didn’t meet you during that time because I would have ruined it by being too clingy and being to needy.

Love, I know that my problems won’t magically disappear when we meet each other, but life would be better. I won’t be complete when I find you, but i’d be smiling a whole lot more and I’d be singing more often.

I am looking forward to meeting you. I am looking forward to the day when the world would stop, even for just awhile and finally, the bells would ring for the person that God truly intended for me to be with.

Until then, only He has my heart.


Love,

Your future wife. 🙂
- admin Leave a comment

“I was broken but He healed me by His grace”

I don’t know how to begin this blog entry. All I know is that I want to write. I was looking at previous entries and I literally cringed at every entry that I came across, because the girl that was writing was so pained and was so conflicted although she pretended that everything was alright.
This morning, I decided to keep a diary again, or a more formal way of saying it is “keeping a journal.” I decided to keep a journal again because there are so many things in my head that need to be written down and sometimes it may be too personal, even for this blog.
This morning, for the first time ever, i finally felt free from people. I finally realized that I could love people freely without expecting anything in return. I am not yet perfected in this and I don’t think I would ever be, but it’s first step to keep my eyes on Jesus instead of constantly feeding off people and expecting them to complete me.
Looking back at previous journal entries made me realize how broken I was and the ironic thing about that was that yes, I was broken but I didn’t even realize that I was.
Through God’s grace, I have come a long way and I thank Him everyday that He has changed my heart.
I was reading John Ortberg’s “The Me I Want To Be” earlier and he mentioned something along the lines of “only God can change someone’s heart”.
It was the time for me to change and I hope that my life can reflect how good God is and how gracious He is.
My 22nd year would be a blast, it would be a time to be renewed fully in Him. I am very very excited over the adventures that He has for me.
- admin Leave a comment

August 14, 2010


Angelie’s Birthday Bash

Happy Happy Birthday to my beautiful friend, Angelie! 🙂
Thank you for the pizza and for the brownies! 🙂 It was a good good day 🙂
Have an awesome year ahead love filled with nothing but God’s best! i love you!
- admin Leave a comment

August 13, 2010

Brand New Office.
I am the happiest girl alive, our office got renovated this week and when I came back to work after a week of being sick, I was greeted with a new whiteboard and a new corkboard.
What could make me happier? What could make me happier?
Nothing really. Nothing more plus the really bright colored paper.
HAPPINESS.
- admin Leave a comment

Little Miss Healthy?

It’s time to give up the pretenses, it’s time to look at the mirror and see myself the way my mirror does.

However, it’s not looking at myself in a deregatory manner because im not a size two.

It’s more of allowing myself to see that i’m not as healthy or as fit as i want to be.

It’s always been a struggle for me because i’ve always done things wrong. I ate too little which led me to eating way too much.

I was a yo-yo dieter and a highly inconsistent excercise person.

I was highly neurotic, constantly counting my calories, basically not living my life. Then i lived my life too much.

So i just stopped.

Until today.

I realized that it has nothing to do with being a size zero, i just want to be fit. i want to eat right and eat healthy.

I want to take care of myself because God wants me to take care of the temple of the Holy Spirit.

I also no longer want my body to be a constant foothold of my insecurities, i want to be free from that.

My 22nd year would be the perfect time for me to excellently and holistically become the person God created me to be.