I was supposed to write about this incident about two weeks ago, but somehow, I always forgot about it once I was in front of the computer. Okay, before I start let me state the point, that I will not be saying who this person is or even describe the person. I will just be talking about the stupid incident and that’s it.

You see about two weeks ago we had dinner with some “people” and that was where my fam and I met the biggest beeyotch ever. She’s way older than I am, prolly in her early thirties and thinks that the world didn’t begin until she was born. Yes, a thirty year old with that kind of ego problem. Okay, okay, being the polite girl that I was I ignored her all throughout dinner while she went on and on about how wonderful her job is and how wonderful her family is and so on. You know the deal with these people. Anyway, again, I don’t really care if people think that they’re God’s gift on earth, if that makes them happy, go ahead. What makes me mad is the fact that she puts people down to feed her inate need to be secured. Another thing with me? Mess with me all you want, but never my family or the people I love. Somehow, this thirty year old thought that being a homemaker is a lame job and this makes her better than my mom. Please, my mom worked before and its her choice to stay at home and she’s done an EXCELLENT job in raising us.

My mom didn’t care, but I did. She kept on yammering and yammering, feeling like she knew everything until the quiet seventeen year old opened her mouth and shut that beyotch up. Who was the seventeen year old?

Me.

You see, the know it all she was said that if given the chance she would be taking up nursing cause she gets to leave right away. Well, thanks to mrs. velarde, I know for a fact, that nursing students cannot leave right away and that they had to serve the country first before leaving.

I said it to her and boy! was she pissed. A seventeen year old raining on her parade. Ha! Its a good think i listen in class.

I swear some people never get over thier little insecurites, even at thirty.

Damn lady! You have some growing up to do. Seriously.

I want to write a million and one things but I can’t seem to sit down and get into detail. I’m just really praying and hoping for the best. Fingers Crossed that things go my way this time.

Please. Haha:)

The dawn is breaking
A light shining through
You’re barely waking
And I’m tangled up in you
YeahI’m open, you’re closed
Where I follow,
you’ll go
I worry I won’t see your face
Light up again
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to rhyme
Out of the doubt that fills my mind
I somehow find
You and I collide
I’m quiet you know
You make a frist impression
I’ve found I’m scared to know
I’m always on your mind
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the stars refuse to shine
Out of the back you fall in time
I somehow findYou and I collide
Even the best fall down sometimes
Even the wrong words seem to ryhme
Out of the doubt that fills your mind
You finally find
You and I collide
You finally find
You and I collide

I haven’t written anything meaningful in a long time. Well, there have been a lot of short lived and cynical thoughts but none of those that lead to what’s really going on in my life. So, how is my life right now?

The answer to that?

I have no idea.

There has just been a lot of twists and turns that even my faithful blog cannot keep up. I am glad that even in just a small way, I am not as emotional as I used to be. I no longer let the little things get to me or maybe I just don’t have the time the energy or the brain space to worry about it anymore. I’ve grown up but sometimes I wonder if that’s a good thing or not.

Thing is I’ve been working on this thing for the past month of my life. You see, I’ve been struggling so much with my past and the last entry I wrote about it ( have you ever?) was really a bitter entry but at least it was honest. I’ve been struggling to let go of it, but I did so in a bitter way and that made me think of everything that has happened before. I know life is so much better now but still at times, I’m back to being thirteen.

But that’s part of the past now. I heard somewhere that getting your life together may mean having to cut out the ugly parts and that can be messy. SO I guess my life is messy right now. Real messy. But I know once i get over it…

Well….then it would be much better:)

for more pictures…
UNAUTHORIZED.MULTIPLY.COM

it was a rockin’ and retro night.
i had fun!;)

“No one travels the highways of success without ever crossing the byways of failures. God allows us to suffer and stumble so we remain strong and humble.”

I’ve finally grown up and matured. I understand that I cannot be perfect all the time.

Details soon. I’m in class hahaha

*wink*

Had an amazing weekend. It was kae’s retro debut last saturday, I super loved the music, the food and everything else. (Pictures coming soon). Watched the game last night, Kings won over Air21. Oh, did I tell you about thier amazing game versus SMB last wed? .. Wonderful;)
***
Curiosity killed the cat…
it simply broke my heart.

Thanks to spending about two hours at the parlor yesterday, I couldn’t help but think of ways to answer the questions always being asked to those cover models. Like what do you do on your free day, what attracts you to the opposite sex( FAQs always seemed to be inclined to these questions) and so on. I decided to answer these questions and amusing what I’ve come up with. (And amusing how it ends with barney. My cynicism can be so evident.)

DESCRIBE YOURSELF IN FIVE WORDS
“Frank, Sensitive, Moody, Affectionate, Childlike.”

TOP FIVE THINGS YOU CARRY AROUND IN YOUR BAG
“Water. Ipod. Cellphone. Planner. A pen. Paper.”

FIVE THINGS THAT MAKE YOU HAPPY
“Kids. Chocolates. Anything related to the 60’s era. New Books. Starbucks. Basketball Games (Goooo Kings!).

TOP FIVE FAVORITE SONGS”Going out of my head- Bob Darren. Don’t worry- Beach Boys. Your Song-Elton John. Man in the Mirror-Michael Jackson. Somewhere Out There” (My list of new songs changes every week so I’m sticking to my classics list”)

TOP FIVE FAVORITE MOVIES
“Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (Willy, not Charlie. I haven’t seen that yet). Never Been Kissed (Do you remember the “Sorry it took me forever to get here” It never fails to make me cry!). Finding Neverland (still searching for my neverland). Clueless (what would the late 90’s be without clueless…tell me!). Sixteen Candles (how would we survive the clueless-less years without this one?!)

CHINITOS, MORENOS OR FOREIGN LOOKING?
“I can never answer that question in a specific manner. My taste in guys changes from time to time. It’s either I’d go for the super Moreno, super chinito or super foreign looking. In high school, I always fell for Chinito guys but after one particular chinito broke my heart I chose to stay away, Chinitos may not be for me.”

WHAT KIND OF GUYS ARE YOU ATTRACTED TO?
“ Guys who look neat and clean. It shows that he takes care of himself. I like guys who dresses simply but can carry himself well. Like EminEm, he could wear a white shirt, jeans and is still able to pull it off. I first notice the eyes and the smile, if a guy’s smiling all the time, that could be a good sign. But to me its more of how he presents himself to people, how he carries himself, that above all attracts me to a guy. If he’s confident and humble at the same time.”

WHAT MAKES THE ATTRACTION LAST?
“The guy’s personality and how he views life. If he’s stable, not just financially, but emotionally as well, then that’s a major plus. He has to have respect for my family and me. I don’t like guys who pretend to be perfect. I have never been attracted to perfection, I’d be inspired by it probably but I’d never be attracted to a guy who claims to be perfect. I never liked the “Austin Aames” kind of guy, I’m more into guys who are imperfect. That’s more interesting to me. I’d rather be with someone who shows me everything that he is, the flaws and everything. Perfection is just plain boring. Guys who accept their flaws are more inclined to be compassionate and sensitive. They hardly have egos, which is another thing I totally cannot deal with.”

WHAT IS A MAJOR TURN-ON?
“If he has respect for everyone around him. If he doesn’t act like the whole world should bow down whenever he passes by. He must also believe and put the Lord first in His life.”

WHAT IS A MAJOR TURN-OFF?”Egoistic Guys and those who go from one girl to another. If that isn’t sick then I don’t know what is.”

DATING PHILOSOPHY”I’d rather be alone than go out with a guy who has a little black book and goes out with everyone who’s wearing a skirt. I can live without such guys and I don’t think I’d agree to be just one of the many. I’d rather spend my entire life alone and un-kissed than be ruled over by a guy like that… But then again, which guy isn’t like that?”

The answer to my question:
BARNEY.
That’s why I love him so much.:)

In my alternate world… spending a Saturday indoors is better than going out and wasting my currently non-existent funds at the mall. In this world of mine, I’d rather spend time doing homework/ term projects which isn’t due until December or probably reviewing for the finals which is in the 3rd to the last week of December. Amazingly so, I don’t find this alarming about myself, I actually find it amusing because I used to dislike the idea of studying… or even staying at home on a Saturday, when you could be you know… at the mall, laughing with friends or something. That was five years ago. Oh man, I am so ancient.

In my alternate world… my parents aren’t the worst people on earth. Of course, I have that respect meant for the older and authoritative people in my life but I treat them more like my friends. I often tell them what’s wrong, listen to their advices, argue when I think that it’s wrong and be as frank as I could when ever the need for it arises. I love my parents. No matter how much we argue and fight over certain things (usually we argue about the simplest things and agree on the most difficult ones). I have been blessed and forever I am grateful. (Now, don’t go concluding that I am the perfect daughter because in my family of four siblings, I am usually the voice of reason, always finding ways to rebuttle whatever my parents have asked me to do. Ha! I’ve been that way ever since I was eleven).

In my alternate world… drinking isn’t fun. Okay, okay I totally have nothing against those people who truly enjoy drinking but it isn’t for me. And another confession, I drink once in awhile, bailey’s, san mig light and other drinks occasionally but again, I simply don’t go to parties just to get drunk. I was born to be this geek who enjoys staying at home, that might change when I’m older but for now. I’m happy with staying at home with my coffee.

In my alternate world…Brad Pitt isn’t hot. I simply don’t like guys who everyone is crushing on. I’m weird that way. As an example, I super liked Chris Evans after I saw Cellular last year, I really liked him…until Fantastic Four came out and everyone was ga-ga over him. I have no idea why, but this kind of mentality rooted from my Nsync days, I never liked Justin, it was Lance all the way.

In my alternate world… my life is okay. Despite me being the biggest geek and the lack of any romantic affiliations… I am happy. My life isn’t perfect ( a point I’ve never failed to mention in almost all of my entries) but I am happy with what has been giving. To me, my life is bliss and although I lack a lot of material things and other things that people might consider in order to have a perfect life… I wouldn’t trade places with anyone because to me… My alternate world is irreplaceable. There is only one Carla Bianca Velasquez Ravanes in the entire universe and when you look at it that way… Life is indeed radical:)

Life hasn’t been a smooth road lately. In fact, its been one helluva of a ride for the past three weeks. Its been so crazy, I’ve been experiencing just setbacks and high highs in a matter of 24 hours. The problems are really way too personal for me to write down even on my very own blog. I just don’t like going through the details of something as agonizing at this. But then again, there’s a reason for everything, I always believed in that but still there’s that sting. I am continually praying for it, for my life in general and how I face each situation that come my way.

I’m joyous though despite the pressure and the need for a break from all this insanity.

Boo-hoo.

Growing up and life in itself.

*sigh*

I just really don’t want to complain about it cause just like all the other things in this world…it too will pass.

(A shout out to kara and kae who listened to me rant last thursday. i love you both mwah!)